Did you ever want to tell someone something that you never got to tell them?

This was the question he asked me yesterday. Followed with a "...like a friend or even an ex boyfriend?" Even before he said "ex boyfriend" I knew he was talking about his ex girlfriend.
It hurt my feelings. I'm a sensitive person and know all I'm going to think about for the rest of my life is that he has something, whatever it is that he wants to tell her in the back of his heart, just waiting there til what...

And what is it that he would say to her?

He wanted to get out of the town that they had spent there x amount of years in. I remember in the beginning of our relationship he said "I'm afriad that one night we'll be out and see 'someone'" That 'someone' he was referring to was obviously the ex.

Then there are times when he's telling me a story and he'll use some random guy's name to talk about her parents or some summer cook out story. I just know when he's doing this. And I smile and listen and do a fake laugh if I have to. And in the back of my head I know it's her.

Part of me is like, we'll this is what he had before he meet me. And I just have to deal with it. Then you know what celebrity couple I think of... Jennifer Garner and Ben Affleck. I think about how Ben and Jennifer Lopez were in the public eye for so long and everybody knew their business and they were engaged. I know it's so cheesey to think if them but I do. One article I read with Jennifer Garner that I'll never forget her saying is, she was asked about Ben and J Lo and she said something like "he has been very respectful with that whole situation and I want to be respectful to him"

I think about her a lot, She's always in the back of my mind and I've never even meet her. But I will respect what they had and I can't control any of that. One thing that Mark said to me that I'll always remember is "without any of that happening (that, meaning past relationships) we wouldn't be here."

It's true. I love him so much and I'll respect his past.